Reposted from Cloud Shadows

On Friday the 15th I spoke with my mom on the phone – we talked about how she was glad to be home from the hospital, she said she was actually feeling good, better than she had in a long time. This conversation was good and made me think we had some time left before she would need to go back to the hospital again. It made me okay with travelling to New Orleans for the weekend where we were meeting my in-laws. They had been on a cruise and needed us to meet them and trade cars with them. We left about 9:30PM Friday night and got into New Orleans about 8:30AM Saturday morning. We got out of the car to walk around the Garden district when my phone rang. I looked at it and saw it was my dad’s cell phone…

Connie Rae Price, age 65, of Bussey, passed away Saturday, October 16, 2010, at Pella Regional Health Center in Pella.
Connie was born on July 17, 1945, in Albia to Irene Little. Connie was raised by her mother and step-father Louis Glasford. She attended and graduated from the Twin Cedars High School, class of 1963. After school Connie married John Price on July 10, 1964 at John’s brother’s house in Bussey. They shared 46 years of marriage before Connie’s passing.
Connie was a homemaker all of her life. She attended Community Regular Baptist Church in Bussey. She enjoyed crafts, sewing, painting, cooking, and spending time with family and friends.
Connie is survived by her husband, John Price of Bussey; her children, Tawnyia (Jeff) Svajdlenka of Tampa, FL., Michelle (Jay) Svajdlenka of Tampa, FL., and Allen (Josie) Collins of Knoxville; and 8 grandchildren. Connie is also survived by 1 brother Jerry DeMarce and 1 sister Joan Rutledge.
Connie is preceded in death by her parents, Louis and Irene Glasford; and one sister, Cherri Hancock.
In lieu of flowers a memorial has been established to the family or to Community Regular Baptist Church in Bussey.

My mom compressed down to 192 words – I want to scream and cry that she was so much more than those words…how she had a heart whose capacity for love knew no bounds, she loved the unlovable – cared for those who could not or would not care for themselves. My mom gave all she had, she suffered so others didn’t have to. She taught me so much – how to take care of a house and make it a home. How to take a little bit of food and make it a wonderful meal – her knowledge was boundless even though she would laughingly say she wasn’t the smartest person on the planet.

I can’t say I didn’t have disagreements with my mom – I did. We aren’t a stepford family - just a normal one. I’ve spent the last week helping to make arrangements, attended a service, hugged over a hundred people, made small talk and agreed with everyone that “yes it’s good she’s not suffering anymore” But in my heart I know I’m selfish – I want her back…I want to laugh with her, cry with her, hug her, argue with her and just sit watching TV with her.

Jeff has meant so much to me this week – just silently being there for me – letting me be me, the me who had to go make funeral arrangements, pick out music, pick out flowers, help write an obituary. I don’t think I could do all this without his support behind me. My children adding their support in to help. I love them all so much and hope I give them as much as they give me. My friends sending me their messages of love and support. I want to hold and thank them all.

Watching my dad this week has been heartbreaking – my parents had 46 years together – at their 40th anniversary they had their church wedding – they did this at 40 because my mom didn’t think she would make it to 50. I guess she was right……….. But Dad has been strong holding himself together most of the time. He had his moments but then so did we all. The worst moment for me was during a video that was made of mom and dad for their wedding – Mom and I recorded a song I had written for my dad during Desert Storm, we (dad and I) didn’t realize that this had been added to the original video. So while watching pictures of my parent’s lives drift across the screen out of nowhere my mom’s voice blended with mine in song. My dad looked at me and I realized what I was hearing - That was my worst moment so far – I’m sure there will be a lot of worst moments moving forward but that one was bad.


Good night mom – I love you.

My Mom

Reprinted from Cloud Shaddows


I’m back to work today after a week visiting with my mother in the hospital. My mom has COPD and is in the last stages of the disease. My dad called me on Wednesday night that my mom was back in the hospital, just 3 weeks after she went home from her last hospital stay. On Thursday afternoon I received a call from my dad – the Dr. had told him it was time to call my sister and me. I could tell from the tone of his voice that things were not good. My mom was told by the doctor that diagnosed her COPD that she had 5 years left – this was 6 years ago, so everyday is a borrowed day.

Dad told me that the doctors had been working on mom all day – she was in ICU and wasn’t expected to make it. So I rented a car and my sister, niece, and I started a fast as possible 24 hour drive to Iowa. Our biggest fear after speaking with dad was that we wouldn’t be in time. (I had just seen my mom in August when I went up for a quick vacation – but my sister and niece hadn’t seen her in a year.)

At some point while the doctors were working on mom she finally was coherent enough for the doctor to explain what was going on and my mom asked “Am I dying?” Dr. Robin answered “yes”. So Mom looked at her and asked “Today?” and the answer was “Possibly” to which my mom responded “I’m not ready to go yet.” So in my mom’s stubborn fashion – she didn’t go. In fact, after hearing that we were on our way up – she started improving.

We got in about 12:30AM Friday night/Saturday morning – and immediately went to sleep. By the time we got to see her on Saturday morning she was doing much better. They had moved her back to her own room, and was very glad to see us. Mom felt guilty that we had wasted our trip to Iowa since she was feeling better and was going to get to go home – to which I informed her that she can NOT feel guilty for NOT DYING! The trip was in no way a waste of our time.

Jeffrey (my oldest) and Cameron (my youngest) arrived on Monday night and we all spend Tuesday morning with mom. Jeffrey is staying up there as he needed a change from Tampa and was planning a move anyway. Cameron came back with us on Tuesday – he didn’t get to see mom for a long time but it was really great that she got to see him at all. We had to leave to return the rental car but none of us really wanted to go. We took pictures and said good-byes and the question in the air was would this be our last good-bye.

The drive home was fairly uneventful – we all had to fold ourselves into the car, because it wasn’t a very big car and there were four of us to get home. The last 200 miles I cried most of the way and have pretty much been crying off and on since then. Every little thing sets me off…

They moved mom into their rehab area called Skilled Care for physical and respiratory therapy for approximately a week before they allow her to go home. After that it’s a guessing game – hopefully she goes home and is able to stay well for a while --- a long while. But we all know that things are going to happen and none of us are ready for them when they do.

On the plus side and there were a couple – I was able to have a conversation with both of my parents about their end of life wishes….which no matter how many times I had tried to have the conversation before neither of them wanted to talk about it. My mom got to see her brother who came to visit her in the hospital and I was able to see my brother and one of my best friends.

Right now all I can do is try to go on with the day to day, call the hospital and check on her progress, and hope that she knows just how much I love her.

My Mom