Reposted from Cloud Shadows

On Friday the 15th I spoke with my mom on the phone – we talked about how she was glad to be home from the hospital, she said she was actually feeling good, better than she had in a long time. This conversation was good and made me think we had some time left before she would need to go back to the hospital again. It made me okay with travelling to New Orleans for the weekend where we were meeting my in-laws. They had been on a cruise and needed us to meet them and trade cars with them. We left about 9:30PM Friday night and got into New Orleans about 8:30AM Saturday morning. We got out of the car to walk around the Garden district when my phone rang. I looked at it and saw it was my dad’s cell phone…

Connie Rae Price, age 65, of Bussey, passed away Saturday, October 16, 2010, at Pella Regional Health Center in Pella.
Connie was born on July 17, 1945, in Albia to Irene Little. Connie was raised by her mother and step-father Louis Glasford. She attended and graduated from the Twin Cedars High School, class of 1963. After school Connie married John Price on July 10, 1964 at John’s brother’s house in Bussey. They shared 46 years of marriage before Connie’s passing.
Connie was a homemaker all of her life. She attended Community Regular Baptist Church in Bussey. She enjoyed crafts, sewing, painting, cooking, and spending time with family and friends.
Connie is survived by her husband, John Price of Bussey; her children, Tawnyia (Jeff) Svajdlenka of Tampa, FL., Michelle (Jay) Svajdlenka of Tampa, FL., and Allen (Josie) Collins of Knoxville; and 8 grandchildren. Connie is also survived by 1 brother Jerry DeMarce and 1 sister Joan Rutledge.
Connie is preceded in death by her parents, Louis and Irene Glasford; and one sister, Cherri Hancock.
In lieu of flowers a memorial has been established to the family or to Community Regular Baptist Church in Bussey.

My mom compressed down to 192 words – I want to scream and cry that she was so much more than those words…how she had a heart whose capacity for love knew no bounds, she loved the unlovable – cared for those who could not or would not care for themselves. My mom gave all she had, she suffered so others didn’t have to. She taught me so much – how to take care of a house and make it a home. How to take a little bit of food and make it a wonderful meal – her knowledge was boundless even though she would laughingly say she wasn’t the smartest person on the planet.

I can’t say I didn’t have disagreements with my mom – I did. We aren’t a stepford family - just a normal one. I’ve spent the last week helping to make arrangements, attended a service, hugged over a hundred people, made small talk and agreed with everyone that “yes it’s good she’s not suffering anymore” But in my heart I know I’m selfish – I want her back…I want to laugh with her, cry with her, hug her, argue with her and just sit watching TV with her.

Jeff has meant so much to me this week – just silently being there for me – letting me be me, the me who had to go make funeral arrangements, pick out music, pick out flowers, help write an obituary. I don’t think I could do all this without his support behind me. My children adding their support in to help. I love them all so much and hope I give them as much as they give me. My friends sending me their messages of love and support. I want to hold and thank them all.

Watching my dad this week has been heartbreaking – my parents had 46 years together – at their 40th anniversary they had their church wedding – they did this at 40 because my mom didn’t think she would make it to 50. I guess she was right……….. But Dad has been strong holding himself together most of the time. He had his moments but then so did we all. The worst moment for me was during a video that was made of mom and dad for their wedding – Mom and I recorded a song I had written for my dad during Desert Storm, we (dad and I) didn’t realize that this had been added to the original video. So while watching pictures of my parent’s lives drift across the screen out of nowhere my mom’s voice blended with mine in song. My dad looked at me and I realized what I was hearing - That was my worst moment so far – I’m sure there will be a lot of worst moments moving forward but that one was bad.


Good night mom – I love you.

My Mom

Reprinted from Cloud Shaddows


I’m back to work today after a week visiting with my mother in the hospital. My mom has COPD and is in the last stages of the disease. My dad called me on Wednesday night that my mom was back in the hospital, just 3 weeks after she went home from her last hospital stay. On Thursday afternoon I received a call from my dad – the Dr. had told him it was time to call my sister and me. I could tell from the tone of his voice that things were not good. My mom was told by the doctor that diagnosed her COPD that she had 5 years left – this was 6 years ago, so everyday is a borrowed day.

Dad told me that the doctors had been working on mom all day – she was in ICU and wasn’t expected to make it. So I rented a car and my sister, niece, and I started a fast as possible 24 hour drive to Iowa. Our biggest fear after speaking with dad was that we wouldn’t be in time. (I had just seen my mom in August when I went up for a quick vacation – but my sister and niece hadn’t seen her in a year.)

At some point while the doctors were working on mom she finally was coherent enough for the doctor to explain what was going on and my mom asked “Am I dying?” Dr. Robin answered “yes”. So Mom looked at her and asked “Today?” and the answer was “Possibly” to which my mom responded “I’m not ready to go yet.” So in my mom’s stubborn fashion – she didn’t go. In fact, after hearing that we were on our way up – she started improving.

We got in about 12:30AM Friday night/Saturday morning – and immediately went to sleep. By the time we got to see her on Saturday morning she was doing much better. They had moved her back to her own room, and was very glad to see us. Mom felt guilty that we had wasted our trip to Iowa since she was feeling better and was going to get to go home – to which I informed her that she can NOT feel guilty for NOT DYING! The trip was in no way a waste of our time.

Jeffrey (my oldest) and Cameron (my youngest) arrived on Monday night and we all spend Tuesday morning with mom. Jeffrey is staying up there as he needed a change from Tampa and was planning a move anyway. Cameron came back with us on Tuesday – he didn’t get to see mom for a long time but it was really great that she got to see him at all. We had to leave to return the rental car but none of us really wanted to go. We took pictures and said good-byes and the question in the air was would this be our last good-bye.

The drive home was fairly uneventful – we all had to fold ourselves into the car, because it wasn’t a very big car and there were four of us to get home. The last 200 miles I cried most of the way and have pretty much been crying off and on since then. Every little thing sets me off…

They moved mom into their rehab area called Skilled Care for physical and respiratory therapy for approximately a week before they allow her to go home. After that it’s a guessing game – hopefully she goes home and is able to stay well for a while --- a long while. But we all know that things are going to happen and none of us are ready for them when they do.

On the plus side and there were a couple – I was able to have a conversation with both of my parents about their end of life wishes….which no matter how many times I had tried to have the conversation before neither of them wanted to talk about it. My mom got to see her brother who came to visit her in the hospital and I was able to see my brother and one of my best friends.

Right now all I can do is try to go on with the day to day, call the hospital and check on her progress, and hope that she knows just how much I love her.

My Mom

What can I say?

Also posted on Cloud Shadows...

I went home to visit my parents and my daughter who is there for the summer break a couple weeks ago - nice flight, horrible layovers. It was a wonderful visit and I got to see one of my best friends - going all the way to 5th grade.

2 days after I got home, my mother ended up in the hospital. Mom has COPD and congestive heart failure. So any illness hits her hard...this is what they found when they got her to the hospital:

Severe pneumonia in both lungs
Heart enzymes were elevated
EKG showed chronic changes to heart
Anemic
Low Blood Pressure
Blood Oxygen level was 65 (should be 95-100)
Dehydrated
Changes to kidney functions
Urinary infection (they think from the dehydration)

She finally came home from the hospital yesterday - and she sounds much better than she did. She gave us a really big scare and we all know this may be the beginning of a lot of scares. As the Dr. told me - a lot depends on how she does over the next few weeks. I wanted to try and arrange to go up there and work remotely for a few months just to be there to help with things.

So I talked to my boss and she talked to her boss and he turned her down. I didn’t get a reason – but needless to say I’m more than a little upset – I’ve completely revamped the way billing is done here by moving all the processes into sharepoint speeding the process up measurably – am currently working the integration of our latest acquisition and moving their processes in to our system – and also utilized my purchasing / IT knowledge for the upgrade of the departments computers. All of this in 6 months and for crap money. What I’m supposed to be happy for – is that they will let me take an unpaid leave AFTER I train a temp to do my job of course. UNPAID! So they would rather pay a temp to do the job than set a precedence or whatever the reasoning. What can you say though about a company that makes their money from outsourcing...?

So needless to say I am weighing my options – as quickly as possible.

What can I say?

I have one of these...

So I got called into my bosses office the other day...I've been working on our departments SharePoint site to streamline and revamp our billing process. Making it simpler and quicker for all involved. My company recently acquired it's largest competitor so the two billing managers were meeting. So my boss calls me into her office to meet him and get initial requirements for moving them into our site for billing.

After about 15 minutes of what back and forth - what information is already there...what information he would like to see, etc. He looks at my boss and tells her "I have one of these too - her name is Linda". ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I am now "one of these" property? What year is it...? It's like saying " I have a girl who does that for me. " OMG so pissed off about it. If I never see him again it will be too soon - but I'm sure I'll be meeting with him more to finalize this process. SIGH.

On the positive side - I got some really good news from my Sprinkly friend. And it makes up for anything bad this whole month.

:)

I have one of these...

Thyroid Good, I Think

So, my lovelies, it's been a few weeks since I talked about my thyroid. I did have the biopsy done last week. About several needles were jabbed in, two were for the anaesthetic. My throat was a bit tender and it bruised a little after, but nothing to really write home about.

Today, I received the call that the 1cm nodule was BENIGN. That was great news for Sprinkles; however, my primary care recommended that I go to an Ears, Nose, Throat doctor to check out why there was some extra bleeding in my throat based on the samples found. I thought it was because they were jabbing around since they needed a longer needle at some point.

I made the appointment today for next Tuesday afternoon after the 4th of July holiday. This will make 4 medical appointments on the schedule for July already. Sigh. Just another appointment on my calendar. I pray for more patience...not patients. ;p

xo

Thyroid Good, I Think

OMG...Our Network

This is unprecedented I know, but I had to gripe about work. For a week now we've had service interruptions at work. E-mails up and down. Applications working intermittently or not at all. A big cluster fuck happened where one of our hubs is located. Not pretty. Poor Tawny's husband has had to deal with it, too.

Today is my first day at work since Thursday and TWO of the applications I work with are not working well. I guess I should count myself lucky that the third one is working. It just makes the day go long as I work from home today.

My aftercare chemo meds are wearing off -- my brain is still fuzzy. TV doesn't hold appeal. Same crap playing on TV. Ugh. I took my blood pressure pill for dessert after lunch. That's good, eh?

Oh -- lookee. I have conference call in 2.5 hours. Something too look forward to this afternoon...

OMG...Our Network

And Now My Thyroid

Things are going great from the cancer front. Progressing mighty nicely as a matter of fact. Woohoo!!

Well -- now I have an ultrasound appointment to check out the nodule seen when I went to the emergency room in April when I had issues with my port. The scan of my heart included a little nodule up in my thyroid. My ultrasound is next Tuesday.

Going to doctor's appointments is the norm for now. I just make the appointments and try to mitigate any kind of side effects from the chemotherapy and address other items as they come up. Face it, I am going to be 40 years old in January. This is the best time to reset my body. I have some aggressive health goals for myself as I progress from cancer.

Yes, I am bummed about the thyroid appointment. All I can do is go.

And Now My Thyroid

Tick Tock

The word of the day is Survive - 3 day weekend ahead, so just need to get through today. Have been working overtime all week and will have overtime and craziness all next week. So for today...just survive.

Tick Tock

Eh?

I hate being worried about people - because when I am worried it means there is a reason to worry and someone may be in trouble. Financial, health, mental? I would much rather everyone was fine and I didn't have a reason to worry.

Funny thing - I know people are worried about me and that irritates me too...not because they are worried (that just means I have friends who care) but what irritates me is the I have given them a reason to worry. Just can't win...

Eh?

Gee Y N?

Some people reading this may know that I've been having a lot of issues...I have "female" issues (see how I travel back to the '50s to talk about this) that are contributing to my anemia problems. At least that is that they believe is causing the problems. So I got an injection last week that is to stop my cycles for 3 months in order to help me prolong the time between now and when I will need surgery. I also had to have a biopsy in order to rule out any cancer or else the surgery could not be postponed. The biggest reason I need to postpone surgery is that after being laid off for over a year I am finally working but do not have any sick time or FMLA to protect my job or my income. Nice catch-22 for me.

Okay so here is the breakdown of how my Dr. visit went on Monday:

I tried to tell dr that i was still VERY BAD (things I don't want to spell out - pretty sure you can figure this out on your own) and they may want to rethink doing the exam and was told that it's no problem...just a day in the life at the GYN...

"we have these little pads to put beneath you" hahahahahaha

then when she saw how bad it was - "oh your life isn't fun is it?" NO SH!T “Lindsay can you get me some more pads?” and once more “Lindsay can you get me about 4 more pads?”

"how long has it been this way?" - since april 12th - "really - for 30 days?" - yes thats what I said - "for 30 DAYS?" - yes - "don't you feel weak" - HELL YES I FEEL WEAK but what are you gonna do?

so now she isn't sure she got enough material (i can't say tissue - it's yucky) MATERIAL to actually do the biopsy

After the exam the Dr wanted to run some more blood tests - thyroid and iron count - when her PA was taking blood the conversation went like this... "wow that's some crazy amount your bleeding, I don't know how you do it" so I asked her what was my alternative? things have to be done I can't just curl up in a ball and stay in bed all day no matter how much I want to



So just waiting to get the results of all the tests



- THEN IEZZI'S (my GP) OFFICE CALLED

I went for blood tests about 2 weeks ago and i have been trying to get the results of that test - well now they want me to go for more blood tests - one of the tests ordered wasn't done - and THEN we'll make an office appointment for you to come in and go over them. UHHMMM no I think I'll deal with my GYN for now thank you very much....

Gee Y N?

Aggravated

I suppose I am letting the aggravation that has been building up within me finally seep out. Having the appointment tomorrow with the therapist is giving me permission. I'd like to think so anyway.

Last Friday I did some power grocery shopping as I need to prepare for the next couple of weeks during my chemo time. After my chemo this Friday, I won't feel up to shopping. You know the routine by now.

On Saturday, I walked for two miles with Kristey. The walk was dicey in some parts, but we stopped and I drank liquids. Even though we started our trek at 7:30am, it was hotter than Hades in the wooded park. When I got home, I was wiped out. I ended up sleeping on the couch all day which aggravated me. I had intended to do chores like cleaning and laundry but wasn't up to it at all. How could two miles take me down the rest of the day? No, I don't need you to answer that. I've had a few people already tell me why. Sigh. I drank coffee to watch Betty White on Saturday Night Live. Betty was awesome in all her skits!

On Sunday, I did five loads of laundry before noon. Yes, that means I started at 7-ish. I washed the floors and cleaned some, too. That made me tired again...which aggravated me. My current physical limitations are wearing on me something awful. In my mind, I can move mountains, but my body says I can just kick sand around. This is disheartening.

I woke up today to some other news online regarding a friend. Well, someone else gave the news, but it was about that person. I can't expect much from a person who is morally depraved and deprived. Still - unexpected news can still be weird to read before 6am. Did it aggravate me? I'll let you guess.

Now to Tawny who had a doctor's appointment this afternoon. I tried calling her on her home phone and also on her regular cell in the early evening. I sent her two text messages about an hour or two later. No responses. Yes, that was aggravating. I hope she is okay.

So now I am getting ready to watch some sitcoms to make me cheery. I may let you know about my shrinky dink appointment. On my other blog, I will definitely. Now on to sitcoms.

Hugs,
S

Aggravated

UGH!

So that's what projectile means...

Not sure what's going on - I think I have food poisoning - just want to go home and sleep. Luckily I'm leaving at 5PM today instead of the 6PM we were scheduled for. It's end of the month billing time so can't really afford to miss any of this week.

Sigh.

UGH!

...

Some days just deserve a BLECH!

...

APRIL F*CKING FOOL'S DAY

This day just keeps getting better and better...

1) Passcode - I forgot my passcode to my laptop...completely! Thanks to my chemo influenced brain, I couldn't remember it to save my life and I used it at least twice yesterday. Aargh! I had to get help from someone at work to be able to log in until I get back to work on Monday.

2) Aunt/Uncle - My aunt is spending the night tonight so she can accompany me to my chemo appointment tomorrow; however, she will not be staying the night tomorrow night BECAUSE my uncle wants her to attend a church thing with him. Really?! I need her the most on Friday night. So from now on, I will leave them out of any future chemos. My aunt will be out of the country for Chemos #3 & #4 and I kinda have those covered, but will call a cab to/from if I have to. She was going to accompany me for #5 & #6. I definitely take a cab for those last two. I don't want to burden them any more than I have to -- it is a long day and jockeying times and rides gets hairy with their schedules. Know this about me -- if I start to feel like a burden or anything to you, I will go at it alone. It will not be the first time I've been alone to do things and I doubt it will be the last.

EVENING UPDATE: We discussed it at dinner and they capitulated. My aunt is staying Thursday and Friday.

3) Medical TV show - As if I don't feel bad enough with my Stage III ovarian cancer and the severity of the cure, I get to watch medical professionals say that eating parsley and celery are good to prevent ovarian cancer by 30% because of the flavonoids. That is not what pissed me off. The female gyno on the show says that ovarian cancer is one of the deadliest cancers and for the 35,000 women diagnosed each year about 15,000 died. Are you fucking kidding me?!

So Happy April Fucking Fool's!

APRIL F*CKING FOOL'S DAY

Medications to make you feel better?

The new medication that is supposed to help alleviate my anemia made me so sick nauseous that I went home from work at 2:30PM and slept until 7:00PM...what happens when the meds are worse than the symptoms? Riddle me THAT Batman!

Medications to make you feel better?

There but for the grace of God....

I was greated on Facebook yesterday by a link from my cousin to a newspaper article about a guy I knew in high school. Bob Zellmer was a little older than me - but then a lot of my friends were older than me back then. (Funny that they are mostly all younger than me now.) Bob left this world earlier this month at the age of 50. In high school I remember him as always smiling...him and his brothers always had a little bit of a reputation then, but when you live in small town middle America all teenage kids have a reputation. He always had friends around him and everyone talked about what a great singer he was.

I haven't seen him in years, probably since I moved away from that small town. But like everything in you childhood things from then aren't supposed to change. A happy go lucky guy from high school is not supposed to die addicted and homeless. These are not things that should happen.

Even though Bob was homeless himself and dealing with addictions - he spent his time trying to help other homeless people have shelter - a place to get out of the weather. I guess that's what living in my small town did for all of us - everyone I know from there would give you the shirt off of their back...something that is sadly lacking these days. I don't know what happened in Bob's life but I do know that it only takes one small thing and you're on a path that is hard to change. I also know that I appreciate everything and everyone I have in my life. I have a roof over my head - friends and family that love me - and that's enough...no matter how much I bitch that it's not.

Rest in Peace Builder Bob - You will be missed more than you know.

There but for the grace of God....

Last Dance

REPOSTED FROM MY BLOG:

You thought you were having a Bad Hair Day? I am just letting you know that I think I win the contest. The picture the other day of my hair was nothing compared to this result after three swipes on partially wet hair this afternoon.



This progression makes today the last official day of me shampooing my hair. I am afraid to dry it since the follicles are no longer how they once were before the chemo. Monday's shave cannot come soon enough. Thanks to my friends and family, I have a full weekend to not think about it too much. One thing is for sure: I will miss the slow dance of my fingers through my hair while I shampoo it. Big Sigh.

Last Dance

Follicle Faith

My aunt and stepmother both have some serious "Follicle Faith". No, it is not a new religion -- just a misplaced faith in me not losing my hair during my chemotherapy treatment. Every friggin' time they call me, they say things like, "Maybe you'll be the first one not to lose hair" or "You're too anxious to shave your head -- wait at the last possible minute". Ugh.

Hair is falling out as we speak. Not in clumps yet, but more than usual. Three medical professionals told me that I would lose my hair based on my chemo cocktail: my surgeon, the cancer center pharmacist who explained the chemicals and a nurse. The taxol and the carboplatin in my chemo mix make you lose your hair.

I wish these well-meaning women would cease their "Follicle Faith". It is bad enough I have been crying everyday for fear that day could the day clumps starts coming out. My head will be shaved on Monday; I am not waiting to see my scalp revealed. I have to get my wig styled on my shaved head. The wig is snug right now and I need to make sure it stretches a bit before I go back to work in two weeks. Believe me when I say I've been mourning impending loss of joy my hair gives me. My reality is temporary hair loss.
.

Follicle Faith

Tuesday again....

Tuesdays appear to not be such a good day for me... While trying to help Jeff find his cell phone this morning I totally forgot to grab my badge to get into my office. When I asked what do I do about it - senior rep tells me that it's a huge hassle to get visitor badge so just borrow hers or co-worker#2's badge. (Co-worker #1 has morning off). OH YEAH - did I mention that I need this badge to actually get back in office from the restroom? So every tinkle time I will now need to borrow a badge from one of co-workers to get back in.

This information was quickly followed by the next set of events:
1. I got an e-mail from a client asking for backup to an invoice...which I had already provided the information I received through e-mail
2. I ask sr. rep about it and co-worker #2 gets involved informing me that I should have sent the scanned file also.
3. What scanned file? (WTF?)
4. It seems that while yes I sent the documents I had been e-mailed the account manager also interofficed a bunch of paperwork which i didn't know needed to be scanned and e-mailed to client. (because notes from previous person were unclear - gee guess who was the previous person?)
5. Co-worker #2 gets all preachy about it being in the notes and walks away
6. Sr. Rep agrees with me that the notes are not clear so I update them for whoever the next billing rep is that gets this account.
7. Co-worker #2 all sullen and biotchy...(did you remember that I'm supposed to be borrowing her badge today for the restroom breaks?)

So all quiet in office this morning as the only ones really speaking are me and Sr. Rep...and that's only when necessary for work (no tension there just both work focused).

And then the final WTF moment... it appears we are all out of regular coffee in the breakroom...and the only flavor available is GERMAN CHOCOLATE CAKE!!! ARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!

And it's only 11:00AM...sigh

Tuesday again....

Tuesday?

Okay so did not want to wake up this morning but managed to get to work on time all showered bright and shiny for the new day. Was leaving early for Dr. appointment. Today was ultrasound and echocardiagram. Work went smoothly and my sister hit me up about 2PM to see what we were planning for dinner. So at last minute we're having an impromptu dinner for 6 tonight. Got out of work on time and to Dr. office with time to spare. Spent the next hour being poked and prodded..."please lay in this strange position that no one would ever actually lay in while I take these pictures of your heart." By the time Jeff picked me up I was sooooo tired. Decided to go home and try to nap before everyone came over. The universe had other ideas though...I think almost everyone I know decided to call me during that short window...

Talked to number one son and invited him to dinner - he accepted along with "can I bring a load of laundry" Of course! So now dinner for 7...so got up from non existant nap and started getting ready for everyone to descend...Jeff and I then remembered that we had to renew our lease TODAY in order to keep our same rent (and believe me we got an exceptional deal on our lease) luckily they had extended hours today at the office due to special they were running. We got there at 7:30 and they were closing at 8:00...so just enough time - we got everything signed and back to the house...everyone had arrived while we were out and Shelli had dinner started. At this time it was already after 8...dinner was finally ready at 9 but unfortunately Jeff had to work tonight at 9 so he wasn't able to sit with us at the table. But all in all dinner was wonderful everyone had fun and it was yummy.

Just finishing up some laundry and on to bed...almost midnight after very busy day and evening. Time for some ZZZZZ's.

Tuesday?

Vampires

So I get up extra early today and rush around because I have to go have more blood drawn. (How do the doctors expect you to get over anemia when they keep taking all of your blood?) We get to the lab right when it opens at 6:30AM and there are only a couple of people there. So all's good right? Should be in and out and on our way to work...but no couldn't be THAT easy. Half of the staff didn't show up on time because of daylight savings time. They didn't set the clocks ahead...so took twice as long and ended up sitting there for an hour for a proceedure that took 2 minutes.

Vampires

Oh so special

I hate to make this all about medical ailments - but it's what I'm going through right now...Heading today for my "Oh so special" yearly exam. Well to be truthful for me it's kinda bi-annual - because I hate it so much. On top of that I have to discuss the anemia I have - along with what is causing it...AND spent one day last week and again last night with weird chest pain. So I have to check and see WTF is that about? Hopefully it's just stress on my body from the anemia issues.

SIGH...

On a brighter note:

A friend on FB posted this today "Morning is nature's way of saying: Live life one more time, make a difference, touch one heart, encourage one mind and inspire one soul."

I liked the sentiment and will strive to accomplish it.

Oh so special

Just a Thought...

from my facebook post today:

On the Bonnie Hunt show yesterday, her mom said to the young lady not picked on The Bachelor, "Rejection is God's Protection." The sentiment can be applied to many things in your life. So if you're not getting what you want, then maybe it's not for you. Jeezus, what the heck do I do about what I AM getting?! LMAO

.

Just a Thought...

Update: Good Veins

Received news this morning from my primary care doctor that my ultrasound came out clear -- no clots. Still doesn't answer why I am having swollen legs. I can be referred to a vascular doctor if I want. Sigh. I'll have to discuss that with my surgeon, but I will more likely have to wait until my Happy Hours taking in my Chemo Cocktails are all done...

Water pills seem to be working quickly. Yay!

xo
.

Update: Good Veins

All in Vein

Jeezus...really? My legs are swelling again. I thought not having the alien cancerous cyst would cure that. After a visit to my primary care physician today and an ultrasound to peer inside, I am not very confident at future outcomes. (BTW -- my surgeon/gynecological oncologist said that I should check with my primary care physician since I had the swelling before I had my surgery. Are you kidding? So I made the appointment...) We must all remind ourselves that doctors "practice" and must guess based on present information. Hopefully, the ultrasound will give me more info.

The lady conducting the ultrasound today said that I may have blown out the valves on a couple of veins after years of being swollen. Even though the huge alien is gone, I may still have issues that can be corrected with laser surgery to close off those veins. All this is supposition and may have to be addressed after all my chemo is done. Fun never ends, does it? Wait until I have to get compression socks -- those are the sexiest pieces of clothing ever!

I also have some pain in my back and hips which primary physician thinks is attributable to the cancer still left or something. To be honest, I feel it to be skeletal from the "debulking" (doctor speak for a really fucking large and heavy watery cyst that made you look nine months pregnant was taken from you and made you lose 35 lbs two weeks after the surgery). What do I know? I am not a physician. Well...not educated and board certified anyway. LOL

In the meantime, I get to take water pills, pee a heck of a lot and find positions that will get me near upside down to help gravity the other way. I'd post a video but that would be too easy for you to laugh at over and over again...

Hugs,
S
.

All in Vein

Now What?

Yes two fabulous crazy chicks and a blog...this could get interesting very quickly.

My WTF moment came about this way - I have been unemployed for 1 year and 3 months, I finally have a job and first day was to have been Feb. 22nd - but due to some processing difficulties and an uncooperative VPN connection the HR person I was dealing with couldn't clear me to start on Monday but was able to confirm a Tuesday the 23rd start day.

This left me with absolutely nothing to do Monday but just do some final things around the house since I would now be gone everyday, once again among the gainfully employed. At 4:30PM my Dr. office called to tell me they received my blood work from the week before and even though I had an appointment scheduled for the 11th they needed to see me right away. WHAT???!! Are you kidding me? If they had called any earlier in the day I could have gone immediately...but I was starting a NEW job the next day!

I called the office the next day to find out that I am EXTREMELY anemic (again???) and they wanted to see me. I made a deal with the nurse that I would start taking iron supplements at the same levels as the last time this happened and we would discuss everything at the appointment on the 11th. She wasn't happy about it but c'est la vie. I am not putting a new job in jeopardy after being unemployed this long.

So the next WTF Now moment will be on the 11th when we try to figure out why I keep becoming anemic. Stay tuned...

Now What?

Impetus

Two amazing middle-aged chicks are starting a blog together. Not for fame. Not for glory. Just to ask the world this question:

WHAT THE FUCK NOW?!

I've been dealing with Stage III Ovarian Cancer. The cancer is out now, but I am about to go through chemo in a couple of weeks for "the cherry on top cure". Some of us will do anything to do impressions of Telly Savalas in Kojak or Yul Brynner in The King and I. Just kidding. For more info on that and me, I have a regular blog. I'll let my writing partner and BFF Tawny tell her side of things.

The impetus for this blog came out of a conversation today. Let's see where it takes us.

Etc. Etc. Etc.,
Sprinkles

Impetus